Weeks 1 & 2

MATT'S TOP 10 FROM SINGAPORE

Week 1 & 2: April 10, 2011 - April 23, 2011

1. It’s HOT here - all the time…

It doesn’t matter whether it’s day, night, January, July, Monday, Wednesday, or Friday – it’s hot here all the time.  I knew it was hot from my previous trips, but this is just ridiculous.  The whole shirt tie combo is not working well coming into work.  When I get to the office every morning, I feel like I’ve just stepped out of a sauna.  I’m also seriously contemplating going with contacts.  I feel like a complete idiot every time I walk outside from being in air conditioned buildings and my glasses immediately fog up.  Brings me back to my junior high days when I first got glasses and got made fun of all the time!

2. The Ministry of Manpower is one weird place…

Besides it sounding like something out of Austin Powers, think of the Ministry of Manpower to be like a Department of Motor Vehicles in the United States – except on steroids.  People everywhere and long waits.  I needed to go in order to get my Singapore Employee Pass – it looks like a drivers license.  Luckily EMC provided me with a “guide” to bring me through the whole process.  Her name was Ms Ng – she never told me her first name although I found at after the fact from a fellow ex-pat that her first name was Poo.  If I ever had a name like that, I’d be trade marking it!  Ms Ng and I became very close.  Not only did she literally tug me around the place like a toy doll, she also massaged both my thumbs with lotion when they needed to scan my fingerprints.  I thought it was a little personal for just meeting for the first time – but when in Singapore don’t ask questions….

3. Charles is the man…

Charles is our real estate agent.  He knows I’m a bit stressed right now because I have to pick out a place to live without Lisa being here to give her approval.  Whereas I know the general vicinity that she wants to live in, picking out the actual apartment is a whole other story.  Every one of them seems to be different.  Luckily – after a tough negotiation – I settled on one this week.  (More on the new place in the weeks to come after I actually move in and buy some furniture – which hopefully Lisa will approve of when she gets here…talk about adding to the stress!)

My favorite part of house hunting was what Charles said to me on the phone the other night after finally agreeing on the price with the landlord: “I don’t know if she’s stupid, or just plain stupid?  I told her she wasted our time but upping the rent by $500 a month.  She’s insulting us.”  I plan on using the “just stupid or plain stupid” line for some time to come.  I love Charles…

4. Hawker Markets are a way of life…

Picture it as a big flea market of inexpensive food.  Everything has pictures which you point at to order.  My first experience was not good this week.  Come to find out I ordered cooked eel.  Picture looked good – taste, not so much.  I ended up grabbing a Subway sub on my way home…

5. Hot Water Switches are not "cool..."

EMC has been kind enough to put me up in temporary housing for a month before we find a permanent house.  It’s actually in a very cool part of town known as Robertson Quay (pronounced Key).  Picture it like Quincy Market, except on a river – lots of bars and restaurants and lots of shopping.   The unit itself is pretty nice.  Bedroom, bathroom, living room, and kitchen – probably about 800 square feet.  The only downside is the “heather switch.”  Like most reasonable people, I though the switch that was labeled as “heater switch” was for the heat in the apartment.  Nope…not that easy.  It’s actually to turn on the hot water heater.  Took me two solid days of ice cold showers to figure this one out.

Every day I get home from work, there’s a new note from the housecleaner sitting on the kitchen table.  It’s turned into kind of a game for me to see what she leaves me each night when I get home.  Below are some of my favorite notes from my first week here – these are all 100% true – I couldn’t make these up if I wanted to:

“Hello Mr. Mainstruck.  My name is Eva and I’ll be your house cleaner.  Just want to let you know you have nice ties hanging in the closet.”

Matt’s Comment to himself: Really?  You went through my closet?????

“Hello Mr. Mainstruck.  I want to let you know I accidentally dropped your toothbrush on the floor today while cleaning.  Please stop by the front desk for a new complementary toothbrush.”

Matt’s Comment to himself: Really? You dropped my toothbrush.  (On second thought I’m glad she told me.  Most cleaners would probably just put it back….and at least she didn’t drop it in the toilet)

“Hello Mr. Mainstruck.  I hope you had a nice day.  I left an apple for you in the fridge.”

Matt’s Comment to himself:  Finally – a nice note!

“Hello Mr. Mainstruck.  I noticed you haven’t been using the kitchen.  Is there something wrong with it or are you missing something?”

Matt’s Comment to himself: I haven’t even thought about cooking yet - in fact, my only trip to the grocery store was to buy some beer.  I’m still trying to figure out how to ride the subway, never mind buying groceries here.  One day at a time.

“Hello Mr. Mainstruck.  Please don’t take the gym towels back to your room and leave them with the rest of your towels for cleaning .  Please leave them in the gym.  They are for gym use only.”

Matt’s Comment to himself : Don’t all the towels get cleaned in the same area – or do you just not clean the gym towels????

I can’t wait to meet Eva face-to-face.  I’m sure we’re going to have lots to talk about…

Here's a picture of my service apartment:

I’m going to try really hard to get a picture of Eva before I leave…

6. My new office is a dungeon…

Every time I’ve been to Singapore to our office building, I’ve been on the 31st floor.  Great views and super nice offices.  Come to find out, this is not where my new office is.  They’ve put the pricing team in what I like to refer to as “the dungeon” – that equates to the 4th floor of the 40+ story building.  Whereas I do get my own office, with a window (that's an upgrade from Hopkinton!), it still feels like a dungeon compared to the 31st floor.  Some interesting facts about my new office:

a) When cleaning it when I moved in, I found a jar of mayonnaise in one of the drawers – totally disgusting – not only do I hate mayonnaise, but this jar was open and had expired over a year ago.

b) The person who comes to empty my garbage every day calls me “boss.”  I told him to call me Matt and his response was – “ok boss.”

c) The lights go off at 10PM and for the life of me I cannot figure out how to turn them on.  I asked the admin on our floor and she said she had no idea they went out.  She did tell me that they do turn the AC off every night at 7PM – which explains why I left work in a ball of sweat the other night (still trying to figure out if this one is a joke or not).

7. Matt’s Favorite Singapore Bar of the Week…

Not that I’m an alcoholic, but those of you that know me well, know that I like an occasional drink every now and then to blow off some steam.   So I thought I’d add a Singapore Bar of the Week to the list.  This week my favorite bar is close to my temporary living.  It’s called “Bar Bar Black Sheep” – what’s not to love about a bar called “Bar Bar Black Sheep!”  Come to think of it, there is one thing I don’t love about it…the prices of alcohol.  This actually goes for all bars/restaurants.  Alcohol is extremely expensive over here – typical pint of beer costs around $10-$18 SGD…which equates to $8-$15 USD…it’s like downtown Boston prices all the time.  Try to buy it at the supermarket and it’s just as bad.  I stopped on my way home from work the other day and picked up a case - For 24 cans of Tiger beer, it’s $52 SGD (about $42 USD) – For those math whizzes out there, you’ve probably already figured out that it’s approx. 80 US cents to every 1 Sing dollar.

8. Big shout out to Kellie and Chris…

Kelly also works at EMC and is a fellow ex-pat from Hopkinton.  She and her fiancé Chris got here a month ago and have been nice enough to bring me out with them and introduce me to a bunch of new people.  If not for them, I’d be roaming the streets of Singapore alone at night…And they’re the ones who brought me to Bar Bar Black Sheep.  My hope is that they don’t get sick of me anytime soon - because then all I'll have left to do is play with this stupid blog...

9. Cricket sucks…

Every time I turn on the sports channels to look for a baseball game (or God forbid – a little Masters golf action earlier last week) all that’s ever on is cricket.  Even watching it for 30 minutes the other day I still have no clue how it’s played…

 10. Bathrooms here are weird…

See below - this is a picture of one of the bathroom stalls on the floor of the building where I work.  It speaks for itself.  And for those of you that want to know – yes, I did take my Blackberry into the bathroom to take a picture of the stall; AND no, I have not used this bathroom.  Quite frankly I wouldn’t know how to use it – and it honestly scares me.

Until next week...hope everyone is doing well!!